A good boyfriend….

Holding doors and bringing flowers are great, chivalrous activities any smart guy knows to perform in a courtship. But at the end of the day, a courtship is about figuring out if personalities mesh and lifestyles click. Not about dressing up like princes and princesses and riding along on noble steeds.

Here are quick ways to tell if you’re dating someone who is actually compatible with you, and not just in the fairytale sense…

1) Conversation is easy. It sounds simple, and it should be. Conversation with someone you’re dating should never feel forced or dreadful. You might encounter some unwanted pauses and some awkward overlaps, but you should never feel bored to tears and merely not feel bored or disconnected.

2) He should be on time. And so should you. If the boy is prompt in picking you up or meeting you when he says you will, that speaks a lot to his preparedness and commitment. Big points!

3) He shouldn’t be a white liar. If you catch him in white lies, he probably makes purple, blue, and red ones too. Be wary of a white liar.

4) He shouldn’t say what you want to hear, he should say what he wants to say. Having a guy build you up constantly is unrealistic and will eventually cause turmoil to your ego.

5) You should first and foremost feel like friends. If you don’t have some common ground for friendship, it will be really hard to make attraction last forever. Friendship is key.

6) Make sure he treats you like an equal. If he ever makes you feel smaller or lesser than him, run away as fast as you can and get with a true knight in shining armor.

7) If it feels wrong, it probably is wrong. Your natural instincts should tell you if something will or won’t work. Listen to them.

8) You don’t have to pretend. If you don’t have to feign interest or sincerity, or pretend to be anything you’re not, this is great. You should feel at ease and comfortable in his presence.

9) You’re the best version of yourself around him. If a guy brings out your good qualities, keep him around!

10) Date Ryan Gosling.